9 Reasons Why People Don’t Respect You And How To Earn It Back.
Each one of us wants to feel respected by people whether they may be known or unknown to us. And If someone disrespects us we feel insulted and hurt. On the other hand, if people show respect toward us we feel great and elated.
We can easily relate to this because almost all of us have experienced getting respected and disrespected by people, Isn’t it?
If people respect you i.e. they don’t say mean words to you, they value your opinion, they value your presence, they value your decision. Then all is great.
But if you think people don’t respect you lately and you are wondering why they are behaving like this. Also, you are confused thinking why they are disrespecting you rather than you being nice to them.
Well…! If this is you, continue reading to get more insight on what went wrong…
Table of Contents
SUPERFICIAL RESPECT VS DEEP RESPECT.
You need to understand the difference between these two. Superficial respect means though people show respect toward you that doesn’t mean they genuinely respect you. It could be just superficial respect and don’t respect you from deep inside. And deep respect means people may or may not show respect directly but they respect you from inside.
In the first case, people will make you think as they respect you maybe because of money or fame or position or contacts you have but it is just to draw some kind of benefit from you. They may or may not respect you from deep inside.
In the second case, people have deep respect for you maybe because they got inspired by you, you add value in their life, you always respected them, or you were kind to them in their lows.
You must focus on deep respect because superficial respect is a product of self-benefit.
Following are the nine reasons people don’t respect you from heart,
1. PEOPLE DON’T RESPECT YOU BECAUSE YOU ARE OFFENSIVE.
People don’t respect offensive people. In case if you are wondering what is offensive means, It means making people feel awkward, hurt, and or insulted with your words, behavior and actions.
You say something intimidating to make people feel hurt.
I can understand that you don’t do it intentionally but people don’t like it. It’s no excused to talk about people that will hurt their feeling.
Never forget one thing in your life, people can forget anything, absolutely anything but they never forget how you make them feel.
If you do it to them they will either avoid you or show their disrespect toward you whenever they get the chance.
2. PEOPLE DON’T RESPECT YOU BECAUSE YOU GET OFFENDED EASILY.
You get hurt and offended easily. It is common with overly sensitive people. If you get hurt over small and casual talks and tease people will try to stay away from you.
Because they will feel guilty for making you uncomfortable and sad or they consider you an immature person and don’t take you seriously.
Emotionally labile people are bad at controlling emotions they get uncomfortable with anything said against them. They feel hurt and sad.
Though they may or may not express it with others people can spot this emotion in you and try to stay away from you.
Because you get offended and defensive easily you appear as a weak and under-confident person.
3. PEOPLE DON’T RESPECT YOU BECAUSE YOU ARE CARELESS.
You are careless and not serious about anything in life such as life goals, work, hustles, relations, and family responsibilities.
People don’t respect careless people as they are good for nothing and can create a burden and liability to them.
People don’t like to hang out with irresponsible and careless people.
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4. PEOPLE DON’T RESPECT YOU IF YOU ARE ALLOWING PEOPLE TO RUN OVER YOU.
You let people to run over you and you just suffer. You let people play with you use you and you don’t raise your voice against this injustice happening with you and suffer silently.
Though other people may not be doing it with the intention still they keep doing it because they don’t feel any resistance from your side.
This happens only in two cases either you lack self-worth and think that you deserve this all or you are unable to set boundaries around you for other people and giving them permission to run over you.
People don’t respect people who can’t stand for themselves and let people use them.
Though people may perceive them as nice guy but they never see him as a high-quality person.
5.YOU DON’T HAVE AN OPINION.
If you don’t have your own opinion and just go along with others in every situation, people will never respect you.
If you are highly agreeable means you have a habit to agree on every decision made by friends, family members, or boss and don’t really have any objection every single time. In such a case, people will start taking you for granted and a time will come when they won’t consult with you as they don’t really consider you as significant in decision making.
And you just wonder why everyone stops taking you seriously as in your opinion don’t matter for them anymore. Ever happened with you? Well, maybe because of your high agreeableness.
If you want people to respect you stop agreeing to every decision made by them. Raise your voice and tell them you disagree with them on a particular thing or decision. They will feel your weight and your presence and start considering you.
6. PEOPLE DON’T RESPECT YOU BECAUSE YOU ARE SELFISH.
Everyone hates selfish people including me and you. Selfish people just think about self-benefit and self-betterment. They don’t think about others.
You cannot rely on selfish people they can dump you or betray you for their benefit. People don’t respect selfish and self centred people.
7. YOU PLAY VICTIM.
People with a victim mentality are really pathetic and toxic. They always cry victims to prove that what is happening with them is not their fault but other people are responsible for this.
For example, they may tell you about how people are taking their advantage and using them but when the time comes they never stand up against it.
They are pessimistic and unsatisfied about whatever they have achieved in life. And always blame other people for all the problems they are facing in life but never accept their fault.
They play the victim cards every time to get sympathy and compassion from you and try to prove that they are victims of situations like it is not them but other external factors responsible for all the problems in their life and they do nothing to improve their life.
People with low emotional intelligence or people with a lack of self-worth are the ones who will play the victim card.
Though they do it for attention sickness and hiding their flaws and mistakes but other people can spot this habit easily and people try to stay away from them because of their toxic habit of playing the victim card.
8. LOW VALUE PERSON.
A low-value person is nothing but a person who lacks integrity in life.
There are several traits of a low-value person such as they have less to no moral values. They indulge in wrong and unethical practices like infidelity, cheating, gambling, fraud, and putting others down.
Or they may be underconfident, nervous, jealous, and judgemental. They may be egoistic and emotionally labile. They have no goals and just live life randomly.
Low-value people are toxic and depressing and it is better to stay away from them. People may show concern to low value people superficially but they don’t have deep respect for them.
Pessimists and negative people are toxic and try to spread this negative emotion everywhere. They are not ideal people to be with because they have a negative view of every situation and incident that Is happening in life.
They don’t leave the single opportunity to hold you back from achieving your goals by demotivating you by making you believe that you can’t do anything great in life.
This is why people don’t respect them and avoid them.
DO THIS IF YOU WANT PEOPLE TO RESPECT YOU.
Following are the hacks to build deep respect for you,
1. UNSHAKABLE CONFIDENCE.
Be confident in what you are doing. No one is confident from birth you have to work on it to become confident in whatever you do.
Learn necessary skills and be honest with yourself. Break down your task into small achievable goals. Once you start achieving these you gain confidence gradually.
If you are confident in whatever you do for example if you are confident with your decision people will start believing in you, they will start valuing your opinion, and start respecting you.
2. BE COURAGEOUS.
Courage comes from confidence and self-belief. Courage is the driving force to achieve what you want in life. It is what made our ancestors live through all the hardships they got.
Courage is what separates normal people from leaders. People feel impressed by courageous people and want to follow them. It creates deep respect for you.
3. PRACTICE INTEGRITY.
Integrity is nothing but following the firm moral principle. Integrated people are ethical, honest and always try to create a happy and trustworthy environment around them.
People with integrity never compromise with their values at any cost. It is very hard to practice integrity as there aren’t many people having this trait.
When people found out integrity in you they will start respecting you.
4. ALWAYS BE OPTIMISTIC.
Never lose your hope because time changes. Optimistic people spread positivity.
You don’t know who is having a tough period in life. If you talked all negative things with such people, they will feel sadder and depressed.
Hence when you stay optimistic and positive in life people will like you for sure.
5. ADD VALUE TO PEOPLE’S LIFE.
If you want to create deep respect for you try to add value to other people’s life. Such as help them reach their goals, try to teach them hard and soft skills, help them randomly, help them to stay motivated, help them in business, and so on.
This will help create deep respect for you among people. They will see you as a leader, messiah and will respect you genuinely.
6. SOCIAL AND INTERPERSONAL SKILLS.
Social skills make a person instantly likable. If you think people don’t respect you try to learn social and interpersonal skills.
It will make you people’s smart. You will learn how to talk to people. How to handle toxic people and how to impress people with mare talking.
If you learn it and apply it properly you will know how to impress people and how to get along well with anyone.
Join courses and toastmasters to learn how to improve your converation skills.
This skill will make people like you instantly.
7. EMOTIONAL AND MENTAL STRENGTH.
Having control over your emotion plays a big role in dealing with setbacks and resentments in life. If you don’t have emotional control i.e. You get angry every time and can’t control anger or you feel sad and awkward after people’s opinion, you feel envious of other people or you get awkward in social situations or you feel sad and depressed when stressed.
Try to work on your emotional strength i.e. Emotional Intelligence. People don’t respect one with no emotional control because they can be toxic and intimidating.
8. YOU MATTER MORE THAN ANYONE ELSE.
To feel loved by others or to love others, you must learn to love yourself. Because you are important more than anyone else. You are worthy to get all the love and respect you deserve in life.
Once you understand this and act according to this people will feel you are something and they can’t neglect your aura. They have to take notice of you eventually.
9. BE EMPATHETIC.
As we established before, a lot of people are suffering silently out there and you never know who is suffering from a hard time. Always be empathetic with everyone around you. And you will surely get love and respect from people.
10. RESPECT PEOPLE.
Because it is a given and take relationship. If you don’t respect people, their opinion, their views, and their likes and dislike they will do the same with you and vice versa.
If you think people don’t respect you check your behavior first.
11. TAKE CHARGE OF YOUR LIFE.
What is happening in your life whether good or bad is mostly depend upon you. It depends on the choices you make, how much you let yourself be affected by things happening around you, courage and confidence you have.
The same way your success and your happiness depend upon you. So take charge of your life. Be brave, take a calculated risk and do what makes you happy. People will spot happiness in you and will try to befriend you, try to hang out with you.
If you ever feel disrespected, following are the nine important reasons why people don’t respect you,
1. You are offensive.
2. You get offenden easily.
3. You are careless.
4. You allow them to run over you.
5. You don’t have an opinion.
6. You are selfish.
7. You play victim.
8. You are low value person.
9. You are Naysayers.
Do this to make people respect you,
1. Have unshakable confidence.
2. Be courageous.
3. Practice integrity.
4. Always be optimistic.
5. Add value to people’s life.
6. Learn social and interpersonal skills.
7. Emotional and mental strength.
8. You mater more than enyone else.
9. Be empathetic.
10. Respect people.
11. Take charge of your life.
If they show respect toword you when you are there but as soon as you leave the picture they start taking bad about you. Know that these people don’t respect you, they are just acting to draw some kind of benifit from you.